"Good-bye", "I love you", "You have been such wonderful friends and neighbors", "I am so grateful for your friendship and support". These last few weeks have been full of these phrases as we packed up and emptied our home in Philly and moved to Arizona, all on our way to South Asia. We gave away and sold the vast majority of our possessions, and I remember the sting in my heart the day my salad bowl left our home. I remember how Judah cried for a long time when our friends came to take away our coffee table, which we'd found on the side of the street. I had certainly become more attached to my possessions than I ever had planned or thought.
But sitting here in Arizona a week after leaving it all behind, my heart mourns most for the loss of the community we had in Philly. I haven't thought twice about my salad bowl. I haven't missed my house. My longing is to walk out the front door and catch-up with my dear neighbor, Donna. To see Bryce outside and quickly get Judah's shoes on so he can play and make farting noises with his favorite friend. It's to walk down to Pathmark and run into Mary and Bob and Paul and Stacie on the way and find out the happenings in their lives the last few days. To have them ask me questions about our journey to South Asia and show genuine interest and affection for our family.
I used to run into an elderly woman down the road quite often. I never could remember her name, but she always called me by mine. She stopped in the day of our final garage sale to say good-bye. She had tears in her eyes and expressed how wonderful it was to have neighbors like us. I felt so ashamed I never knew her name. But, I will never forget her face or the conversations we had.
I cried the whole way through the last 4 or 5 Sundays at Lighthouse Worship Center, our church in Philly. I couldn't even look at Iris, my dear friend, or I would just start crying all over again. People like Iris are un-replacable, unlike my salad bowl. Someone who loves me, never judges me, and always makes me laugh.
And then there's my Bible Study friends. The girls I spent most of my time in Philly with...studying God's Word, play dates, outings. My circle of closest friends, who I could always call and get together with at the drop of a hat, and be inspired, encouraged, and renewed.
It all makes me realize....in the end, home has nothing to do with four walls, furniture, fancy TVs, decorations, my favorite dishes. It has everything to do with the people who make my community. I think there's something in most of us that wants to make our house a home. So, we fill it with pretty things and make it our masterpiece...spending lots of time, energy, and money to make it just right. And there's nothing wrong in that to a point. But, I'm realizing more and more that the real investment that will last forever is not in the stuff of my home, but in the people of my community. Because in the end, all the pretty stuff will go away, get old and ugly, or we just might have to get rid of it all for one reason or another. I'm so thankful that I took the time and energy to invest in my community in Philly. It wasn't always easy, but I wouldn't trade that community for anything. Although I can now fit the sum total of my possessions in two suitcases, a carry-on, and a couple small boxes, my cup runneth over!
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
"On Blessings and Sacrifices" - from my Grandma
I have a heritage in the Lord that I hold very dear. My grandparents and parents both made the decision, years and years ago to follow the Lord halfway around the globe, for the sake of the cross, and to make His Name known.
While visiting my 86-year-old grandma, Elsie Hunter, last month, she gave me a copy of a short article she had written about 45 years ago. She was then a missionary in South Africa, caring for missionary kids of parents who worked in the bush. She had 6 kids of her own, and felt a ton of heartache for and with her children as she fulfilled God's call on her own life. She poses the question, "is it really worth it?" I was encouraged by her words below, and think you may be also.
"On Blessings and Sacrifices"
Little did we think nineteen years ago that the big, healthy, baby son, that the Lord had loaned to us, would be boarding a South African Airways plane to soar thousands of miles away from us to go to Bible School in America. As I thought upon this, my mind also returned to the time when we had to part from Joyce and Janice nearly three years ago at Kennedy Airport, and with broken hearts, come thousands of miles over here. And then Janice came over to see us for nearly five weeks and we had to part with her again about three weeks ago. There is so much to do that I don't usually allow myself the luxury of meditating long on these things but, with this one that is so close to our hearts, I asked myself the age-old question, "Is it really worth it?"
Is it worth leaving those whom the Lord entrusted in your care for a time that is seemingly much too short in retrospection, and go out where, many, many times you are misunderstood, distrusted, unloved, and perhaps unrewarded, humanly speaking? This is the question that haunts the minds and hearts of many and is the greatest problem ever faced by a missionary couple. Can we really lay all on the altar when the "ALL" includes our own flesh and blood? Many must "count the cost" over and over before sending their own dear children to us, whether they be six years old or sixteen. Then, having "counted the cost" they bring all the children they have and, with breaking hearts, drive off and leave them here with us. As the Lord has seen fit for us to experience the same thing many times, we mingle our tears with theirs, and learn to love them and feel with them, making a bond that draws us close to the Lord for His grace and comfort.
As I thought on these things, I came to a conclusion. If I am here on a perpetual holiday; if I am here to take rather than to give; if I am here for any selfish, self-centered reason at all; and if I have not done my very best in the task that Lord called me to do, then I am come in vain. I have not only betrayed the Lord and those who pray and gave to send us to the field, but I have betrayed my own dear children, who must turn to others for love, guidance, and comfort. We are very much averse to tear-jerkers in messages and letters, but felt that we should share our griefs with you at times, as well as our joys. In the midst of the grief at parting with Jim, is the joy that he loves the Lord and wishes to honor His Word and serve Him too. Many missionary parents have had grief upon grief when their children turned from the Lord and went their own way. We've also had the joy of seeing Joyce and Janice train for Christian service and wait upon the Lord for His direction and guidance. his blessings always outweigh the sacrifices.
Elsie Hunter
Fairfield Children's Home, South Africa
My husband, child, and I are currently in the throws of departing to serve God in a far away land. When I read my grandmother's word, I take courage. There are some really tough good-byes ahead, and yet, I believe with my grandma, "his blessings always outweigh the sacrifices." And we are seeing the blessings every day! Thank you, Jesus!
While visiting my 86-year-old grandma, Elsie Hunter, last month, she gave me a copy of a short article she had written about 45 years ago. She was then a missionary in South Africa, caring for missionary kids of parents who worked in the bush. She had 6 kids of her own, and felt a ton of heartache for and with her children as she fulfilled God's call on her own life. She poses the question, "is it really worth it?" I was encouraged by her words below, and think you may be also.
"On Blessings and Sacrifices"
Little did we think nineteen years ago that the big, healthy, baby son, that the Lord had loaned to us, would be boarding a South African Airways plane to soar thousands of miles away from us to go to Bible School in America. As I thought upon this, my mind also returned to the time when we had to part from Joyce and Janice nearly three years ago at Kennedy Airport, and with broken hearts, come thousands of miles over here. And then Janice came over to see us for nearly five weeks and we had to part with her again about three weeks ago. There is so much to do that I don't usually allow myself the luxury of meditating long on these things but, with this one that is so close to our hearts, I asked myself the age-old question, "Is it really worth it?"
Is it worth leaving those whom the Lord entrusted in your care for a time that is seemingly much too short in retrospection, and go out where, many, many times you are misunderstood, distrusted, unloved, and perhaps unrewarded, humanly speaking? This is the question that haunts the minds and hearts of many and is the greatest problem ever faced by a missionary couple. Can we really lay all on the altar when the "ALL" includes our own flesh and blood? Many must "count the cost" over and over before sending their own dear children to us, whether they be six years old or sixteen. Then, having "counted the cost" they bring all the children they have and, with breaking hearts, drive off and leave them here with us. As the Lord has seen fit for us to experience the same thing many times, we mingle our tears with theirs, and learn to love them and feel with them, making a bond that draws us close to the Lord for His grace and comfort.
As I thought on these things, I came to a conclusion. If I am here on a perpetual holiday; if I am here to take rather than to give; if I am here for any selfish, self-centered reason at all; and if I have not done my very best in the task that Lord called me to do, then I am come in vain. I have not only betrayed the Lord and those who pray and gave to send us to the field, but I have betrayed my own dear children, who must turn to others for love, guidance, and comfort. We are very much averse to tear-jerkers in messages and letters, but felt that we should share our griefs with you at times, as well as our joys. In the midst of the grief at parting with Jim, is the joy that he loves the Lord and wishes to honor His Word and serve Him too. Many missionary parents have had grief upon grief when their children turned from the Lord and went their own way. We've also had the joy of seeing Joyce and Janice train for Christian service and wait upon the Lord for His direction and guidance. his blessings always outweigh the sacrifices.
Elsie Hunter
Fairfield Children's Home, South Africa
My husband, child, and I are currently in the throws of departing to serve God in a far away land. When I read my grandmother's word, I take courage. There are some really tough good-byes ahead, and yet, I believe with my grandma, "his blessings always outweigh the sacrifices." And we are seeing the blessings every day! Thank you, Jesus!
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